…My True Love Gave to Me
Down at Florida Seaside Villa
Lancelot: Come on down honey, I got you a special treat.
Judith: Is is animal, vegetable, or mineral?
Lancelot: Hmmm, I’d categorize it as confectionary.
Judith: Put the kettle on, I’ll grab my Tender Tootsies.
Judith: Mmm, rumballs, my favourite. Pass me a serviette please.
Lancelot: Not just any rumballs. They’re from Vermont – “double the rum for twice the fun.”
Judith: Oh my, I don’t know if it was the rum or the balls that didn’t agree with me! Where did you get them?
Lancelot: At the flea market.
Judith: Unnngh, grooooan. The flea market! What was the expiry date on them?
Lancelot: Expiry date? I dunno, they were loose in a box.
Lancelot: Sorry sweetie, let me draw you a bath. You’ll feel better after a good soak.
Judith: What’s that racket? Did you leave the radio on?
Penguin 2: Hey Bud, did anyone tell those couple of chicks from the yard about the show?
Doggie 1: Yeah, they’re not coming, they’re not much into opera.
Angel: Sssshhhh; Hunding is just laying down the law to Siegmund.
Bass Singer: For one night my house shall be thy refuge, but – tomorrow see to thy weapon, for thou shalt pay with thy life for the dead….
Meanwhile over at the Trailer Park
Lannie: Joodles, come on out an give me hand with this delivery.
Joodles: DELIVERY! No way. No more decorations.
Lannie: Naw, this one is edible. It’s chooo-co-late.
Joodles: Chocolate? Where’s me Crocs?
Lannie: Okay Blue, when I says “haul”, give ‘er.
Joodles: Wow. Listen, let’s send that wild hog over to the food bank to make room in the freezer.
Joodles: Aaaaah, this is the life.
Lannie: Hey, git that fudge away from Blue. Chocolate is like arsenic for hounds.
Joodles: Ooooh Lordie, I think I’m dying. Where’d ya git that fudge anyhow?
Lannie: Over at the flea market. The fella says it the best fudge. Made by nuns up in Mississippi.
Joodles: In what century?
Lannie: Sorry, I’ll bury what’s left. Listen, can ya take that hurlin’ inside? You’re startin’ to attract wildlife.
On the Eleventh Day of Christmas My True Love Gave to Me
Eleven Chunks of Chocolate Confection.
© Judy Parsons 2017
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