Christmas, Day Seven

….or On the Seventh Day of Christmas, My True Love Gave to Me: a Beverage Dispensary.


Down at Seaside Villa, out back in the man cave:

Kenneth: Hey there Lan, I heard you made a fabulous bar out of the new man-cave.
Lancelot: Sure did Kenneth, sure did.
Kenneth: Give it a proper name?

Lancelot: Sure did, my good buddy. I call it The Milky Way. Seemed like a good name for a bar. Can I get you something to drink? The shine is a bit fresh but I’ve got lots of beer.
Kenneth: I could take a beer.
Lancelot: What’s your fancy? I’ve got Shakesbeer, (that’s a classic), Hair of the Dog (that one will cure whatever ales you, heh, heh), Beer and Roses (Judith likes that one) and A Brewed Awakening.

Kenneth: What’s this rig for?
Lancelot: Pole dancing. It doesn’t get much use these days, I had to give it up when I got my new hip.

And over at the Trailer Park, out back:

Kenny: Hey Lanny, I heard you made somethin’ first class outa yer man cave.
Lannie: Sure did, Kenny, sure did.

Kenny: Watcha gonna call the place?

Lannie: The Kit Kat Lounge. Seems like a good name fer a bar. What can I gitcha? The shine is a bit harsh yet but I got beer in the cooler. Lemmi look. There’s Sudz, Beer Belly (that’s a stout), BYO Beer, and Adam’s Ale (that’s a bitter).

Lannie: Stick around and there might be entertainment later. What time you gonna start the bowl dancin’ Joodles?
Joodles: Wine o’clock.

Meanwhile back at Seaside Villa, main house: 

Firefighter Dave: Someone called in a fat fire?

Judith: Oh my heavens, thank God you’re here. The stove must have gotten too hot.

Joodles: I jsut can’t imagine why I didn’t notice. Can I get you something to drink? I’m afraid I only have half a bottle of Veni Vidi Vino left but I can open the Drinkerbelle.
Firefighter Dave: No thank you Ma’am, I’m on duty but I’ll take a glass of soda pop if you’re offering.

Judith: Well, you didn’t save my bacon but you did save the house. I can’t thank you enough.
Firefighter Dave: No need to thank me; that’s just what we do Ma’am, that’s just what we do.


© Judy Parsons 2018

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